Life was not turning out as he’d hoped.
Divorced, Disabled, Broke, and approaching 50.
He was living with his parents, estranged from his children, and completely lost on how to turn it all around.
So he came to me for help.
The first thing we did was work on his largest stumbling block…addiction.
He was committed to changing his life and compliant with therapy.
After several months, he was drug free and sober. But he wasn’t any happier.
So, we made a plan.
When life is overwhelming, one of the best things you can do is stop, take a few minutes, say a prayer, and write out a list.
Write a list of things you need to do. Then prioritize the list.
This is how you prioritize: You start by arranging things in the easiest order to accomplish. Next, organize it into a chronological list based on what needs to get done for the next item to get done. Then look at the two lists and figure out the best way to merge them into one list.
Then all that’s left is to start at the top.
Keep things as simple as possible.
Here’s what my friend did.
He figured out his budget. Then he saved a small amount of money every month until he had an emergency fund.
This way, when his truck broke down, it wouldn’t be the end of the world. He could handle it.
He started focusing on his relationships. He made sure that when he had time with his kids, he was present and not needy. He made it about them and not him. He didn’t complain about their mother. He didn’t whine about the times he didn’t get to see them.
After the emergency fund was accomplished, he saved enough to comfortably move out of his parent’s house and still have money left over to help his kids.
You’re thinking, “this is a no-brainer”. “The plan is too simple”. But it took over a year for him to accomplish. And simple doesn’t mean easy.
Most people do not have the Will to delay gratification that long. They see a year of sacrifice and just decide to give up. But not my friend.
He hit his goals. He started to feel accomplishment and pride. (the good kind of pride).
And that my friends… builds momentum.
It’s not like he didn’t have set backs or more problems come up. But he just kept working the plan.
Now, he’s out of his parents house, married, and most importantly… happy.
This post isn’t just for people struggling with addiction.
A simple plan may be just what you need to help with your depression, anxiety, weight loss goals, financial struggles, corporate climb, or whatever.
When you’re at the bottom, it may feel impossible to get back up.
But trust me, you can. I see it happen every day.
It’s true that some people need medications to help with depression, anxiety, addiction.
But a lot of people just need a plan.
A simple plan.
And they need someone that has their back and keeps them accountable.
p.s.
A brief discussion on the making of a list.
You make two lists. One with the easiest to accomplish and the other of priorities and then you have to merge them. You can’t just start with the easy things.
For example:
Note that my friend had to start with the hardest thing first, sobriety. This had to be done so that he could work on the others.
Your list might be different. You may not have to start with the most difficult.
Just make the two lists and do the best you can to combine them in a way that makes sense.
Let momentum build…
And before you know it…
You’re living in a world of infinite potential.
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